Do you know how to suffer?

“To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning the suffering.”

~Friedrich Nietzsche

My Grandpa always told me it was a good idea to allow plants to suffer a bit...

In the hot sun of the Central Valley of California, the ground would dry up fast, and the leaves of the vegetables and cotton plants would wilt. Your first reaction is to water, water, water and freshen them up. But Grandpa explained that this would only create foliage, not the all important fruit. The lack of water made the plants think they were dying, and they would push out their fruit in an effort to create before death. It works.

I was reminded of this as I considered taking a week of a closer look at ‘suffering.'

A close friend asked if I would take up the subject and shine my joyous perspective on it. They were seeking some hope in dealing with suffering in their life. As I mused about the word and its meaning, it occurred to me that I should start with what suffering truly is, and what it is not….

Suffering is not just being in pain or discomfort emotionally, physically or spiritually.

When you are in pain or discomfort, you have a potential for a solution. You have options for healing. There is hope there. When we are suffering, there are no answers for the suffering - at least that can be seen or found by us. Like the plants, we can only see this suffering as ongoing and continued. We are here in this place, and there is nothing that can take us from the suffering. While you will hear people say, "Oh wow, I am suffering from this cold.", or, "I am suffering from loneliness.", they are just sick or sad, and they can get better from these things.

Suffering is not likely to ever end. 

When we are truly suffering, it's a situation or circumstance that we can't resolve. People who understand this know the difference. They may even slightly chuckle to themselves when the hear the word misused. They know that suffering produces something that pain or discomfort never will. 

Suffering is not usually self-imposed.

We are not likely to put ourselves willingly in a place of suffering. It doesn't jive with the will to live and survive. We can hurt ourselves, damage ourselves emotionally or damn ourselves spiritually, but we don't throw ourselves into suffering. 

Suffering happens to us. 

And then we realize we need to get busy learning how to live with it.

And that's when we see the fruits of it.

Cheers.